Author: Sandi Sadar Šoba
Artist: Inspector Cluzo, The
Label: Fuckthebassplayer Records
Release: 2011
Length: 33:43
Rating: 4.5/5
Revolution in music has always been a matter of perspective and interpretation, and with the Gascon duo The inspector Cluzo you can’t pin down any political note right away – at least not first and foremost – because their five years together have been about this above all: the explicitly vulgar filth of glorious rock’n’roll, funky playfulness, cheeky danceability, and a live punch with no real equal. A lesser-known but not unimportant fact is that this rebellious duo, in the manner of stubborn musketeers from the land of Dumas’s D’Artagnan, sticks religiously to the motto: »Fuck the bass player!«. After more than 500 gigs around the world, more than 50 thousand albums sold and two much-talked-about DIY records, it’s time for a third, atypical follow-up that’s beyond any ranking by strength. The reason for this rather bold claim is simple – the record comes wrapped in a gorgeous comic-book package, where besides the superb design, sharp production and the direct play of catchiness in your ears, what really stings is the above-average musical literacy and a menu of delicious sweet treats.
Holed up in the shelter of their own studio in the little town of Mont de Marsan, the two »culprits« behind the instant magic – the chubby but energetic guitarist and vocalist Laurent Lacrouts and the lanky drum virtuoso Methieu Jourdain – roped in a rich lineup of local funk-playing musical aces, and the result is the record The 2 Mousquetaires, which, wrapped in a design feast by Taiwanese comic-book co-conspirator Chris Chaos, is a product with extraordinary value. The Gascon duo speak out about Gascon values without mincing words, and with a hyperenergetic projectile of funk and rock’n’roll they stand up for the traditional values of authentic music-making – the kind with a spine, naturally. And the music is just what it should be: dirty, playful and made to be listened to at full volume! The opening shot of passion, the track The 2 Mousquetaires Of Gasconha, is right off the bat empirical proof of above-average quality: besides the fat sound of a filthy Gibson SG, which this time sounds juicily funky, you get outstanding rhythm and punch woven in, a gorgeous horn section is just the cherry on top, and the backing choir brings a flawless touch of James Brown and the black elite of musicians with soul and balls into the first part! They say themselves that the truth is closest to a perfect fusion of the Melvins, who finally and down to the last breath beat Marvin Gaye to a pulp, and despite the clichéd form the whole thing is compact and incredibly listenable! You don’t miss the bass guitar, and the follow-up, the track Wild And Free, after an intro you’d attribute to Dave Grohl, is immediately tailored into a more ominous Audioslave or R.A.T.M. mode – of course with more commercial, dirty, funky grips! Malcom and Phil are the driving rotor, and with a 17-year pedigree of playing and getting tempered in various bands they’ve developed a style all their own: sharp, refined, sparkling and made for fun. The music has balls and shakes the foundations of classical concepts, and instead of the White Stripes’ stripped-down feel you’re this time charmed by a fullness you can’t fault in the slightest. On top of his superb guitar playing, Malcom shows off a superb pair of vocal cords, smuggling Jamiroquai subtlety and high-pitched screams into the spectrum of manly vocals, and they sound nothing like the singing of castrati! Move On Up is proof that a slightly higher vocal range can still be manly and testosterone-soaked. The excellent horn section doesn’t overdo its inserts, the dynamics of the record are like a smooth cruise down the highway of pleasure the whole way through, and the music is made for lovemaking, falling in love and passion!
The suspense of the instruments coming in one by one on Telefoot recalls the funky toying with dance standards by the late king of pop Michael Jackson, but the two Gascons have blown such funky soul into it that moving, swaying your hips and shaking out primal moves from your sleeves like on a conveyor belt is a perfectly natural thing to do. The border between funk, blues, rock and pop has been crossed so many times that the conglomerate of blending turns into a fully independent genre game of the senses, and the generic ingredients don’t cause any allergy or aversion to excessive sugar levels! Why A Vulgar French Band Cannot Play Shitty English Pop Music gives the rhetorical question a clear, loud and honest answer. To all the sanctimonious uncles and aunties who accuse music of demonic seductiveness, vulgarity and obscenity, the duo has just two words: »Fuck You!«, and with middle fingers raised we’ve danced our way to the middle of the record without stuffing ourselves on the gorgeous dishes from the menu of the Gascon untamed!
I Want To Mmm The Wife Of French President is a gorgeous dedication to Sarkozy’s wife Carla Bruni, who besides her charms and her idiot of a husband gets honest attention from the prankster duo. They’d both just, mmm, work her over, and with real manly love bring the smile of a satisfied woman back to the beauty’s lips, while the sugary romantic petting of the senses, with sweet keyboards toying with the standard of the song Whiter Shade Of Pale, the one Procol Harum conjured up, delivers a punchier continuation in a more optimistic atmosphere. Fuck The Bobos is dedicated to all the dim-witted morons, corporate puppets, masterminds of consumerist rape, and all the Panamanian conquerors of your wallets, and the two Gascons once more repeat a catchy chorus: »Fuck The Bobos!«. Gorgeous! After that, the revolutionary revolt of Power To The People is all the more a given, and the awakened revolutionary spirit melts beautifully into a funk’n’roller blow, aimed at applause for a catchy, already-heard but by no means boring set of riffs, which, after a eulogy to the immortal inspector from the Pink Panther, is crowned with a funky call to revolt in blacker shades. The raised fists of the Black Panthers’ salute are followed by a reckoning with the hippies. In times when nothing is free, the servile offering of free hugs is suspicious, say the two guys from the French backwoods. Capitalist dragging on about the falseness of old values deserves another guttural: »Fuck you«, and The Inspector Cluzo hit the notes in a way you may have caught from The Living Color, while the softer lovers may have caught it from Jamiroquai. But everything good, decent and damn catchy doesn’t end here yet! Adishatz, with revolutionary flutes and a call to preserve the traditional values of stubbornness in Gascon, pours into your heart and ears like a well-timed pause, a breather, so that with the closing act, the track Que Som Cabelhs, they can wrap up in a song that keeps the pride of homegrown roots. The tradition of Gascon defiance and pride spreads infectiously into the ears of Slovenian troubadours too, and with that the initiation into the noble order of satellite ambassadors of Gascony is completed just as it should be!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Evr3KP7wrvg
Everything else is unimportant and superfluous, my dears, and if you don’t believe it, at least let yourselves go a little into the play of imagination that Phil and Malcom will undoubtedly infect you with, and following the imperative of the main slogan you’ll come around to the fact that the gravity of the bass doesn’t necessarily depend solely on the four or five strings of additional members. The 2 Mousquetaires is a record that will win you over instantly and steal the lion’s share of your heart, though part of the magic is still missed that way. The Inspector Cluzo are a band who show off all their punch and know-how live, and even with this stripped-down version of the spell, success is fully achieved for the third time. No sappiness, no filler! No faked orgasms! No phony revolutionary posturing that would follow some market logic and servile values! The duo, with their hearts at the helm, follow only their inner impulses of life’s rhythm, and the heartbeat regulates, pervades and drives such a gorgeous stream of thoughts, musical juiciness, sensuality, and that one thing without which any listening can be damn exhausting – fun. With that, part of the soul stays rooted, despite the years, in childlike enthusiasm, youthful rebellion and idealism, and the rheumatism of bitter middle age bows to the call to dance, after which even the gray of this world is a little more bearable.
Lineup
Laurent ‘Malcom’ Lacrouts – electric and acoustic guitar, vocals, keyboards
Mathieu ‘Phil’ Jourdain – drums, percussion, backing vocals, keyboards
Guest musicians:
Phil ‘Feal’ le Rouzic – tenor sax
Benoit ‘Mols’ Molina – trumpet
Stephan Kraemer – keyboards
Jean Luc ‘Allez le Stade Montois’ Laboudigue – flute, tambourine
Claude Laspes – Gascon speech
Gaston Lagrange – Gascon speech and jokes
Production
The Inspector Cluzo
Tracklist
- The 2 Mousquetaires Of Gasconha
- Wild And Free: The »Indignés« Song
- Move On Up
- Téléfoot
- Why Vulgar French Band Cannot Play Shitty English Pop Music?
- I Want to Mmm The Wife Of The French President
- Fuck The Bobos
- Put Your Hands Up
- Power To The People
- Fuck Free Hugs
- Adishatz
- Que Som Cabelhs
